Life Cycle of a Summer Song, Part 3: Why Songs Are Like Sandcastles

Why writing a song is like sculpting a sand castle

You put lots of effort and care into every little parapet and archway, and then a big wave dislodges the entire foundation from underneath.

@#$%!

Unfortunately, the obstacles that arise during songwriting are far less predictable than the tide.

Quick Recap

If you haven’t read the rest of Life Cycle of a Summer Song, you’ll probably want to start at the beginning.

When we left off last time, I had managed to sketch out a first verse, a last verse, and a bridge. For the bridge I ended up using the material that I had intended to be the chorus. Oops.

So I needed a new chorus, and I needed a second verse.

Problems

My first chorus idea, “Let’s Not Go Home Tonight,” didn’t work at all. I liked the verses a lot, but the lyric’s transition from those verses into this chorus sounded very sudden and contrived.

To complicate matters, I had somehow ended up with verses consisting of 7 lines each. In some songs that would work fine, but in this case it was very awkward. I ended up having to let the lyric sit overnight so I could get a little perspective.

Songwriting Gear: Pre-Chorus
The next day, I added a two-line pre-chorus in an attempt to build a bridge from the verses into the chorus. I couldn’t really tell whether it was working or not, and ended up having to work on other songs until the next day, when my eyes and ears were fresh again.

Problem: The pre-chorus wasn’t enough; the transition was still awkward. “Let’s Not Go Home Tonight” just wasn’t going to work.

In a moment of defeat I threw up my hands and conceded that “Goodbye Summertime” would have to be my chorus until I could come up with something better. I was pretty unhappy about that because the title is so derivative of the Bradbury novel Farewell Summer, but I needed a new chorus badly.

I was desperate—and a little panicked, knowing that you all would be looking over my shoulder waiting to see how the song turns out. Letting you all into my writing process brings with it a form of stagefright I haven’t experienced before.

How a Pre-Chorus Killed and Ate My Chorus to Gain its Powers

After leaving the song to marinate for one more night, I was quick to notice the next morning that the pre-chorus I’d written would work nicely as a chorus.

How’d we drift here to the deep end of summer?
August is fading; it’s almost all over

A quick check of all the verses—confirmed! It’d work with each one! No need to rip off Mr. Bradbury! Terrific.

The new chorus wasn’t quite long enough yet, so I set out to add another pair of rhyming lines.

How’d we drift here to the deep end of summer?
August is fading; it’s almost all over
And September’s coming; will we still be friends
When I fold up the blanket, put it back on the bed?

Hmm. I’m a little worried that I’ll lose my listeners with that comment about the blanket—will they remember the passing mention it got way back in the first verse? Better add a line to clarify.

…
When I fold up the blanket, put it back on the bed?
Wash out the sand and put it back on the bed

First-Person

I also had a point-of-view problem that I’ve now neatened up. Some of the verses were in third-person and others were in first. Finally I decided to use the first-person POV to make the story seem more immediate.

Inventory

Here’s the lyric so far:

Verse 1

I’m taking myself apart
in the changing room by the lake
folding my glasses, balling my socks
hanging my belt on a nail
I pull off my shirt
And shake off my jeans
I step out of my wallet
and photo I.D.

I swing the door open,
Step down on hot sand
And there’s my friend Janey
unpacking the basket
bikini tied off with a little black blow
at the cup of each hipbone.
She puts on her shades as she
Spreads out the blanket

Chorus

How’d we drift here to the deep end of summer?
August is fading; it’s almost all over
September is coming; will we still be friends
When I fold up the blanket, put it back on the bed?
Wash out the sand and put it back on the bed

Verse 2

(planned, but not written yet. Shows the couple together in the sand, just spending time together)

Verse 3

Late afternoon, a chill rolls in
I hoist the plastic cooler
and slam the trunk shut
as the clouded shadows grow darker.
Leaves hiss; a sudden wind
Pulls a few strands of Janey’s hair loose
Rain dots the windshield
Time to vamoose*

With the radio low, we drive the winding dirt road–
Seated close with damp hair and goosebumps; here we are
The crunch of gravel, the lurch of a pothole–
Sand from the beach on the floor of the car

*note to self: vamoose? Not sure how I feel about that rhyme.

Chorus again:

How’d we drift here to the deep end of summer?
August is fading; it’s almost all over
September is coming; will we still be friends
When I fold up the blanket, put it back on the bed
Wash out the sand and put it back on the bed

Finally

The lyric’s almost done. I still need to write a second verse, which is a bit of a problem because the song’s already quite long and descriptive.

Once the second verse is accounted for, I’ll just have to neaten up the syllable counts of each line to make sure that the same melody will work for all the verses.

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